Your Leadership Coach

The word for the week is "Values” We all strive to work in today’s dynamic times without compromising our values.   When the way we want to live your lives is aligned with our actions, we are happy.   When they are in conflict, unhappiness sets in and conflict ensues. This conflict destroys your ability to be creative, to innovate and grow personally and professionally. This week complete this awareness exercise to discover the behaviors that tell the world what you feel is important, what guides your life, your values. List your top five values. Next to each value, state your behaviors that are evidence to you and the world that these are your values.   For example:   My number one value is family.   Everyone will know this because I rarely work evenings and weekends so I can spend time with my family.   When you have completed the five values and evidence, put this in a safe place. Next, identify five people to help you with this awarene...

The phrase for the week is "Stop, Prioritize, Act.” When clients or friends share they are feeling overwhelmed, I understand that it could stem from exhaustion, anxiety, worry or a feeling of helplessness. In my line of work as a consultant and executive coach, it is usually a 'things to-do list' that has gotten totally out of control.   There are countless reasons for a person to feel overwhelmed. One solution is to reframe what we tell ourselves.   Instead of saying, “I’ll never get all this done in time,” reframe the story to list all the things you know will get done.   Negative thoughts are just not helpful in this situation. Now is a good time to press the pause button and set two or three priorities for today, three for tomorrow and so on.   Taking deep breaths really help.   If you can’t jump into a yoga class, take a quick walk around the block, put on some relaxation music or just move to another location with something fun to read for ...

The phrase for the week is "Don’t Forget What You Already Know.” How many times over the last year have you heard yourself saying? ·          I knew she would say that? ·          I knew that wouldn’t work but I thought I’d try it anyway? ·          I can’t believe they voted that down? Is it that we forgot what we already knew about the parties or situation?   Of course not, it’s much like retroactive interference.   That occurs when new information interferes with your ability to remember previously learned information.   It’s when you become so focused on your own idea that it’s like a lunar eclipse in your mind.   The only thing you can see is your idea and the outcome you envisioned. The solution to this affliction is to press the pause button and ask yourself, “What do I already know about this scenario and how can I best...

The phrase for the week is "Contingency Planning” When I was growing up in Chicago, I loved to play chess.   What I loved most about the game was trying to predict what moves my opponent might make and what I would do in response.   I’m too impatient for chess now, but I have used those skills throughout my career and am confident it has been the foundation for much of my planning success stories.   I call it contingency planning but the formal term is scenario planning. It is so much a part of how I approach my personal and professional life, I rarely realize I’ve engaged this tool.   In order for this level of planning to work, you must be committed to the amount of time it takes to sift through all the possible outcomes or scenarios.   Often, a person will only plan for the outcome they want and when things go awry, they are back to square one--researching, planning, etc.   Often there is a mourning period before they are able to regroup to beg...

The phrase for the week is "Be Open.” One doesn’t have to be in charge to help shape the environment for open and honest communication.   What kind of environment do you help to create? What is your body language saying when a colleague or friend comes up with an idea that you think is ridiculous? Do you roll your eyes and/or give that body language of “Oh my goodness, here we go again! Or, do you embrace these ideas and look for ways to nurture them and consider their merit? Bring a new perspective to your next meeting or gathering. Challenge your own assumptions.   Note how you are received and the impact you have. I am open to new perspectives and new ideas.

The phrase for the week is "Get Enough Sleep” We all have read, heard or felt the benefits of getting a good night’s rest: ·          Better Health ·          Better Sex Life ·          Better Memory ·          Less Pain ·          Better Weight Control ·          Better Mood ·          Clearer Thinking I’ve been functioning on 4 to 5 hours sleep for years, and I can point to a host of friends and colleagues who have done the same.   As I get older, I can see and feel this bad habit must change.   The first thing I did was get into regular sleeping habits. I really try to go to bed and wake up at the same time each day. Even if I don’t go to sleep or wake early, I don’...

The phrase for the week is "Play to Your Strengths” Don’t get me wrong, I understand the importance of feedback, but no one ever focuses on the good feedback, just the negative.   The term” plan for improvement” annoys me too.   We are hard-wired to focus on the negative.   Our brains respond so differently to compliments and praise.   It energizes us in a way improvement plans don’t. What inevitably happens is that the employee abandons their strengths to focus only on their weaknesses.   If the news is a surprise, they wonder, does everyone know I have this weakness and aren’t telling me?   Are they having secret meetings where this is discussed?   It’s like getting to the end of the day and finding out that you had spinach stuck in your front tooth all day. I’m not suggesting that you ignore negative feedback.   Not at all.   We can all grow and become better humans when we are made aware of our behaviors or work product that a...

The phrase for the week is "Prepare for the Inevitable” This week’s affirmation is for the optimist!  This blog is for the o ne who always expects the best in themselves and in the world. This is a chance to press the pause button and reflect on what’s to come and what, if anything we can do to prepare when it isn't a question of if, but when. The idea here is to make this personal. Develop a list this week of things in your life that are inevitable and that require you to have an action plan. Set deadline dates to outline your plan of action.   Here’s my partial list: ·          Retirement ·          Marriage of a child ·          Restricted mobility, due to bad knees ·          Death of a parent ·          Closing consulting practice I embrace the unknown...

The phrase for the week is "Financially Speaking” When I’m coaching a senior manager or executive who wants a seat at important C-Suite meetings, I ask one question--How’s your business and financial acumen?   If it’s a face-to-face meeting, I usually get a cold stare.   If I'm coaching by phone, the silence can be deafening. Here’s the deal, reading a profit and loss or any other financial statement is important.   What’s more important, however, is understanding what it means in relation to the company as a whole.   It is no secret, employees with business and financial acumen are better at thinking strategically, see the bigger picture relative to the company’s success and clearly understand how their function impacts that success.   Also important is understanding how the company makes money. This knowledge will accelerate your opportunities to be included in important discussions.   I choose to purse an MBA to shore up this area of weakne...

The phrase for the week is "Invest in Your Network” Thought I'd keep the investment theme going another week. On this day when taxes are due, I'd like to remind you that investments in your network are also due! Too often I speak with young and senior professionals who invest little or no time in building and expanding their network. It is usually during a personal or professional crisis when the alarm sounds and they realize they have no network.   They are all alone. When you have built a thriving network, you’ll know. You are privy to information that hasn’t gone public yet or perhaps, never will.   You are smarter than your peers because you have a body of knowledge and expertise that you can tap into with a quick phone call or email.   You are the go-to person for counsel and information.   People want you on the team. How do you build or expand your network?   Begin with securing a mentor (see March 11, 2019 blog post).   It doesn’t...

The phrase for the week is "Fix Your Relationship with Money”  Money was once a clouded mystery to me.   I spent many years fearful of it, embarrassed by the lack of it, and unclear how money was defining me. About twenty-five years ago, I took stock of my relationship with money and wondered, what does it mean to be rich?   I realized that being wealthy isn’t just about having material possessions, but also-and more importantly-being wealthy of spirit, having a passion for the work I do and pausing to realize all my blessings. I began to change my focus from making money to managing the money I made.   I’m no longer concerned with the deposits being made to my savings or checking, but the deposits of time and love being made to my family, friends, and the next generation of leaders looking to carve out a niche in this world. I talk more about this in my contribution to the book,  Souls of My Sisters . There are countless books on the market abo...

The phrase for the week is "Think Big, Visualize It And Then Let It Go." Make a clear distinction between wants and needs.   About twenty years ago, I finally decided to go through a box of papers I’d promise to clean out for years.   Amongst old bills, letters and photos long neglected, I found a faded sheet of paper containing a list of things I wanted to accomplish in five years and then, in ten years.   I had totally forgotten about this list and got chill bumps all over as I realized that it was ten years old, almost to the day!   This was my list of “wants.”   I had accomplished everything on the list but one thing.   It was something I later determined I didn’t “want” anymore.   Upon reflection, I remembered my state of mind when I developed that list. I was afraid to think big. Would accomplishing these things help define me?    Of course, I now know the answer is NO! I remember thinking I “needed” more money.   H...

The phrase for the week is "Listen Without Defending and Speak Without Offending" I remember the painful sting of my boss’s words in my first PR job.   “William (Bill) Pajaud said, “Cheryl, you’d get more done with less rework if you were a better listener.   And, you’d probably have fewer planning meetings if everyone in the room listened.   I left his office, determined to become a better listener and test his theory. These seven little words by Margaret Drake, I believe, are the foundation for any success I’ve enjoyed—“Listen without defending and speak without offending." Bill was right.   A good listener excels at all the basic human relations skills critical to success in all professions.   A misunderstanding can account for missed deadlines, projects that don’t match with expectations and other problems.   A good listener seeks out other points of view, thus showing respect for others and helps to facilitate open, honest communicati...

The phrase for the week is "Check Your Toolbox" Never attempt to climb a mountain without the right gear, support & mental toughness. Failure to do so can leave a scar on your soul. I will make a list of tools I need for my leadership toolbox. Share your progress here!

The word for the week is "Mentor." Betsy Plank was a mentor to so many in public relations, including me! When she donated significant funds to her alma mater, University of Alabama, she helped to establish the Plank Center for Leadership in Public Relations. It ensured her legacy of mentoring would be passed down for generations. Having a mentor is one of the foundational blocks for a successful career and successful life.  If you don’t have a mentor, this is the week to research and identify potential confidants.  If you already have a mentor, this is the week to connect and review your goals and aspirations. Knowing what you want from a mentoring relationship is critical. Before you sit down with your mentor for the first time, decide what you hope to learn. Ask yourself what you want in work and life. What assets will help you get there? Identify the strengths that will best serve you. Then, honestly examine the roadblocks, challenges, or weaknesses t...

The phrase for the week is "Don’t Wing It” Design your career path by first developing a written plan.   The process I recommend couldn’t be easier.    I take the basic elements of a business plan and apply those to brand “You.”       Be clear on your strengths and how they align with your passion for the profession you’ve chosen.   Knowing your values will help you seek employers or clients that are a comfortable fit.   Do your research and perform your own SWOT analysis (strengths, weakness, opportunities, threats). In the planning phase, spend an adequate amount of time using the research to support your plan.   Consider all possible outcomes and how you will respond. Hold yourself accountable by creating an action plan with deadlines. Tap into your passions and signal to the world you are here and ready to realize your destiny.  I use all my resources to develop a career plan that aligns with my values. Sh...

The phrase for the week is "Make Someone’s Day” Thursday is St. Valentine's Day!  Actually, the entire month is devoted to romance.  Make someone's day this week! Act surprised, even if you aren't--make someone's day! Spend the week performing random acts of kindness.   Researchers found that when you do something nice for someone, everyone wins. You feel amazing and you share joy to someone dear or a total stranger.    Just performing an act of kindness at least once a week leads to happiness. The acts can be as simple as holding the door for someone, complimenting an outfit or paying for lunch.   According to Dr. David R. Hamilton, acts of kindness create an emotional warmth, which releases the heart-protecting hormone oxytocin. So protect your heart and make someone’s day! I perform random acts of kindness all week. Share your progress: https://www.facebook.com/AStepAheadPR.Coaching

The phrase for the week is "Pick Up The Phone." When in doubt about tone or intent, pick up the phone and talk! Let’s face it, something you think is pretty funny, may be lost on someone else.   It bears repeating here that people from different cultures and backgrounds speak and write differently.   You may convince yourself that it’s quicker to send a request or reply by email or text, but if you now have a thread of 10 or more responses, something else is not getting done. Practice my 2-by-2 rule for one week and measure the impact. If you’ve sent two emails or texts and the other person has sent two on the same subject, pick up the phone and stop the madness! I pick up the phone when I realize I’m having a conversation through text or email. Share your progress: https://www.facebook.com/AStepAheadPR.Coaching

The word for the week is "Return." Return the smile, return the compliment, return the touch, return the gift, return the favor! Today, we celebrate the life and legacy of the Reverend Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. He was a servant leader that encouraged each of us to make service to others a part of our lives and work. Not everybody can be famous, but everybody can be great because greatness is determined by service.” -- Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Check this out!!! Stephanie Brown of the University of Michigan did a study on seniors and found that individuals who provided practical help to friends, relatives, or neighbors, or gave emotional support to their spouses, had a lower risk of dying over a five-year period than those who didn’t. Interestingly, receiving help wasn’t linked to a reduced death risk. Not enough time?  There are benefits to writing a check! Another study found that giving money to someone else lifted participants’ happiness more th...

The word for the week is "Focus." Distractions!!!   Abolish them. Eliminate them.   Send them to their rooms.   Easy for me to say!   Are you sitting down? I recently read a study that shows that people are most able to truly  focus best for an average of only six hours each week.   No wonder we aren’t getting anything done!   And all this time I thought it was too many meetings and not enough sleep. In the book, “Eat That Frog”, Brian Tracy states: I figured out long ago I do my best work early morning.   Anything I’ve done late night requires a note from home asking for a do over.   If you haven’t settled in on what time of day and where you do your best work, note it and file it for future use when focus is required.   I focus on the things that really matter at my high productive time of day. Share your progress: https://www.facebook.com/AStepAheadPR.Coaching