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Are You a Fixer?


The word for the week is "Fixer.”

If you ever feel the compulsion to “fix” someone, consider the consequence of failure for you and that someone.

Fixers have this innate desire to rescue or help another person.  The problem is, the help comes in the form of “this is what you should be doing.”  They are self-righteous and have an obsessive need to correct or make the person perfect.



Once the fixer has taken on the assignment (self-selected), an emotional attachment is created and the behavior can become oppressive, impeding the person’s growth.

If you are a fixer, you know that the more you practice this behavior, the better you get at it.  Sometimes, the dependence created can wear thin for you over time.  But you soldier on, finding the next poor soul to fix.  You become vested in the outcome you envision and if things get worse, you get worse.  You rationalize that you’re doing good when in fact, the outcome isn’t about the other person, but about you feeling good and in control.  Unfortunately, the person being fixed feels totally out of control and has become so dependent on you, they have lost the ability to do anything or think for themselves.

There is a fix for the fixer!  Work with a coach or therapist to work through a process to begin establishing healthy relationships.


I believe that others can accept personal responsibility for their own lives and actions.

#fixers #fixyoufirst

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